Welcome to our team!
Disclaimer: All profiles were written by other members of the team collectively and no one was harmed in the making of this post.
Sara Shoup (The Cow Whisperer)
If you had to swim in any food what would it be?
“Tomato soup. Soup is really comforting to me so I imagine it would be comforting to swim in. Also, swimming in it eliminates the need for a bowl or spoon. #lessdishes.”
This is Sara, one of our fearless leaders. She is 24 years old and she comes from a family of pig farmers in Ohio. She’s best known for making up conversations between the cows on our farm. She is super motivational and always encouraging.
Kiana Cole (kiswagmoneycole)
What do you think gives you your swag?
“A whole lot of Jesus, a dash of Fergie, and a sprinkle of the cast of SNL.”
This is Kiana, a Will Ferrell fanatic, future president, and professional krumper. Her stank face will bring you to tears and she’s best known for going to bed at 6pm. She has a big heart and is great with kids.
Mallory Goan (National Geographic)
Would you rather have lizard legs or a frog face?
“Lizard legs, because then I could crawl on the walls.”
Mal is pictured above sporting her handy Amazon reference guide about all the exotic creatures we never see. She is a brave, river-bathing warrior with an unmatched love for coffee and photographing all the bugs before Zach can kill them. She has a huge heart and a gentle spirit.
Liz May (Honey Lemon)
What are you most likely to #retweet from this trip so far?
“#onlyintheamazon or #amazonlyfe”
Liz May is the “hashtag” queen and most likely to use the phrase YGG (you go girl), dolphinately, soy amazing, YOU GUYS, or “it’s our first (blank) in the Amazon!” It takes her approximately ten minutes to jump from anything higher than 5 feet. She’s always positive and has an upbeat attitude.
Jenni Harris (The Spoon)
If you were given a spoon or a spoon, which would you pick and why?
“It’s too spoon for all of this”
Jenni is best known for taking the spoon when we eat spaghetti, due to lack of forks. She’s also the queen of puns and extremely selfless. Her journal looks like Picasso’s sketchbook. Every word she says is dripping with wisdom.
Madison McClure (Big Mama or Mamacita Grande)
Which Shakira song do you most identify with spiritually?
“Hips Don’t Lie, because my hips don’t lie”
Madison is most likely to be seen in the kitchen singing to Shakira and plotting how we can sacrifice Chelsea. She’s always energetic and loud even when she’s sick at 3 in the morning. She talks with the speed of a bullet train, but is always the first to make you feel better.
Lori Williams (Mom)
Which color minivan will you buy once you have 7 kids?
“Beige because it’s practical and goes with everything.”
Lori is best known for keeping the beat during worship and breaking her leg while dancing to Cheetah Girls 2 alone. She’s gone through 100 baby wipes in less than 3 weeks. Lori is always putting others first and she is a prayer warrior.
Liz Hebel (Whitney Houston)
Will you always love me?
“AND IIIIIII-E-IIIIIII WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOUUUUU”
Liz is a California girl, she’s unforgettable. She is best known for belting out Whitney at any moment in time and leading the squat squad. She is our unofficial translator and has been bringing in the LOLs since ’94. Liz is the first to step up and help when needed, and is a natural leader.
Jacob Boyd (Grandpa Boyd)
Are you more secure in Christ or your mosquito net?
“I would like to believe I’m more secure in Christ because” (Jacob took too long to answer as usual, he’s still thinking as you read this)
Jacob is our team theologian and the Bible Master, as well as the plunger master. He can plunge a toilet better than any plumber known to mankind. He can juggle for 18 minutes and 51 seconds while doing tricks. He always relates things back to scripture and provides answers for many of our questions about faith with patience and understanding.
Chelsea Jonathan (Canada)
What’s your favorite line from the Canadian National Anthem?
“I don’t know but I like the ending because it’s a big finish, eh” (She didn’t actually say eh)
Chelsea is our token Canadian friend, and at 4’10.5” she is our smallest teammate, with one of the biggest personalities. She is best known for complaining about Canadian Netflix and destroying Canadian stereotypes every day. She is incapable of walking through mud without getting stuck. Chelsea has the best sense of humor and is always willing to lend a hand.
Zach Blakemore (Sassy Diva)
What’s your proudest kill?
“Human or bug?”
Zach is our tarantula/cockroach/scorpion killer, he can also be found checking all of the girls beds for bugs. His rendition of the Itsy Bitsy Spider puts fear into everyone’s hearts. His long locks of hair give him strength like Samson to carry multiple jugs of water up the hills daily. He is extremely hard working and never complains.
Ciara Bowman (Herbs)
How do you feel about all of the bug murders?
“It’s sad but needs to be done.”
Ciara is a dedicated plant eater, and carries her powdered peanut butter with pride wherever she goes. She is the sole defender of Nino, our dog, who everyone else wants to kill. She has a giving heart and is always the first to fulfill a need as soon as she sees it.
Megan Rainey (Princess Peach)
What’s your rap stage name?
“Meg$eggin. That’s what they call me.”
Megan is our very own Georgia Peach. She is best known for rapping about plantains and having the best Eno location. She is a world class ballerina even though she refuses to show us any dance moves, probably because she would make us all cry. She is incredibly kind and compassionate, with a loving heart.
Chris Burns (Frocket)
When do you most feel like you’re in your mother’s womb?
“Whenever I go to the womb festivals and they dress me up in their best wombs.”
Chris is our other fearless leader. He’s often seen sporting frockets and plaid. In his ideal world everything barks. He’s best known for saying random things like “do you ever wake up and think you’re in the womb again? “ Chris is always the first to ask how you’re doing and what you’re thankful for.
